“For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness
and brought us into the kingdom of the Son [Jesus Christ] he loves,
in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. . .For God
was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him,
and through him to reconcile to himself all things,
whether things on earth or things in heaven,
by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.”
Galatians 1:13-14 & 19-20 (NIV)
Sometimes I lose perspective. Sometimes I lie to myself. Sometimes I just forget. But let it go on record that I sin.
My fleshly nature rears its ugly head in sometimes private, sometimes public, but always painful ways.
Last week, I had one such sin encounter that left me feeling utterly empty, broken, and convicted. And let me just say…
It. Was. Ugly.
As I replayed in my head a conversation (unfortunately not with myself) that had erupted from a place of intense frustration, I began to feel the weight and face the ugliness of the sin responses that I had exhibited through my words:
The sin of fear – maybe more like sheer terror
The sin of pride
The sin of self-reliance and a complete lack of trust
The sin of a desperate craving for financial security
And to make it worse, at one point in the conversation, I may have even tried to justify these responses by citing that God just wasn’t practical enough.
And as I continued to process the words that I had said, I knew I didn’t really believe them. I was angry. I was frustrated. I was scared. But out of those emotions, I had allowed myself to say things that didn’t reflect my core beliefs. Things that didn’t reflect who I’m striving to be. Things that didn’t at all reflect or honor the Lord.
I lost sight of eternal perspective.
I lost sight of the gospel.
I lost sight of Christ.
All because I got lost in a moment of sin.
And yet, there was beautiful redemption in the midst of the ugly as the recognition of my sin served as a humbling reminder to the very core of my being of just how radically I have been transformed in Christ.
Because of His sacrifice.
Because of the cross.
Because of His victory.
Sin is horrible and ugly. MY sin is horrible and ugly.
But while my fleshly nature is displayed far too often, I’m no longer bound my sin. So I sought forgiveness and let it wash over me in a flood of relief and restoration.
And in the aftermath of the ugly, there is great peace.
Because there is Christ.
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