“Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.”
Psalm 43:5 (ESV)
After settling into the realization that the type of position I had been working towards was pretty much off the table and that the chances of a similar position becoming available in the near future were slim to none, I honestly wasn’t sure if I would hear from the missions organization again.
The end of the month was fast approaching, and it was my understanding that if I hadn’t heard anything by then, I wouldn’t be receiving an invitation to attend the required orientation the next month.
However, a short time later, I did receive an invitation, but because there still wasn’t a likely opportunity for placement, I turned it down … ultimately withdrawing my application from “active” status and bringing this process to a formal close.
I was disappointed, yes, though honestly not to the extent I would have expected.
And while it was tempting to view this almost-six-month process as wasted time … or even failure … I choose to trust that the Lord had and/or has a purpose even for that.
I choose to trust that if this wasn’t where He was leading, He will faithfully guide to the right thing, and if serving in vocational missions is still the right direction, then He’ll provide a different way.
Because I knew (and know) that God was (and IS) the same. Still sovereign. Still good. Still in control.